You don't reach the age of 60 without going through many seasons of life. Some I have glided through gracefully, while others have been survived with weeping, wailing, and gnashing of teeth. A few have been barely tolerated, but then there were those that were deliciously savored and reluctantly bidden farewell.
My early childhood, as a product of the innocent 1950's, was enjoyed in a way I could only dream about for my own children and grandchildren. So little television and technology. So much family time and playing outside. The above picture is one of my favorites. In case you see no possible resemblance to the way I look today, I am the one sitting cross-legged on the chair. My Grandmother Rose is holding my little brother Andy and my cousin Dixie, and my Granddaddy Rose is holding my Aunt June. Yes, my grandparents added their 6th child six months after I (their first grandchild) was born. We lived next door to them when I was age 5 until about 9, and their house was THE gathering spot on all holidays and every Sunday afternoon. My granddaddy was a well-respected barber in the City of Athens, who never owned a car, and my grandmother had severe motion sickness so she was the epitome of a stay-at-home mom. She was an awesome cook. Awesome. Not much money, but somehow there were plenty of groceries.
The picture below shows my beautiful momma and handsome daddy. I was in one of my many awkward stages (especially in terms of hairstyles), my brother was always doing funny things, and my little sister was adorable. Do you read that Elder Brother Syndrome in what I just typed? Ha! My mother LOVED Elvis Presley and wouldn't miss an episode of "As the World Turns." My Dad, after being a school teacher, bus driver and principal, had just gotten hired as a mathematician at Redstone Arsenal (back when computers took up whole rooms and weren't even as powerful as a hand-held calculator is today). We never missed church -- Sunday morning, Sunday night, Wednesday night, and Vacation Bible School -- unless we had a high fever, measles, mumps, or chicken pox. Times were simple and very, very good. Not much money, but so much love.
Just a couple of years after this picture was made, my Dad was asked to move to Troy, AL to become the Asst. Supt. of the Alabama Baptist Children's Home. He accepted the job. We made this drastic change, and that season will be described in another blog on another day.
My teenage years took place in Troy. Again, another blog for another day.
I started wanting to attend Samford University when I was in about the 9th grade and heard about a wonderful piano teacher there named Mrs. Betty Sue Shepherd. I LOVED my time at Samford, and Mrs. Shepherd had a profound influence on me. That season is definitely worth a whole blog.
While home from Samford one Christmas, I met Steve Pearson (I hope you read my tribute to him in the 40th Anniversary blog I wrote), and not many months later, the Newlywed Season of our lives began. It was another lean season in terms of money. We had a student loan, and I made $15 a week playing for a small independent Methodist church. Believe it or not, that bought a tank of gas and a week's worth of groceries. On Mondays I taught piano lessons to two young girls, so on Monday nights we went to Burger King and then played pool at the Auburn Student Center for a penny a minute. We were so much in love. We had NO IDEA we were just barely makin' it. Definitely, it was one of those Savored Seasons. Ahhhhhhh.
Then, reality time came with graduation from college for both of us and the time for starting careers, getting a mortgage, and making babies. Take a look at these cuties. Didn't we do a good job?
My youngest daughter posted the well-known verse from Ecclesiastes 3:1 on her Facebook page recently. "
To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under heaven." I'm not exactly sure what prompted her posting on that day, but I can guess because I was once in a position similar to hers. Young children, lots of runny noses, constant visits to the pediatrician for ear infection re-checks, scraped knees, many nights with sleep interrupted by bad dreams, throwing up, or coughing, etc. etc. I just had 3 children in 5 years. She has 4 little girls and is almost 7-months pregnant with a baby boy. There are innumerable great moments that happen during those years when you are rearing little people to be successful adults, but it's tough on your body, your nerves, and your patience. I've only heard of 2 women in my life who made it through the years of rearing a lot of children (one had 4 and the other had 8) without raising their voices. To this day I am in awe of Mrs. Sam Boster and Mary Quinn.
Only one of the children was a teenager in the above picture, but shortly thereafter, all three of them were teenagers. Once again, there was weeping, wailing and gnashing of teeth -- both by them AND by Steve and me, but if it were possible, I would wave my magic wand and have them all at home again. There was constant activity, drama, and a stream of friends. Food was always involved. It was about this time that many churches were building Family Life Centers. My husband's famous words were: "The kitchen table is the REAL Family Life Center." Almost always, we had supper together at night with the television off. Now we were often interrupted by people who had problems with their dogs or cats, but we waited many, many nights until Steve got home, so we could eat together. A memorable season, indeed.
One by one, the children started leaving the nest for college. My wise friend Angie said, "Connie, you'll cry every day for about 3 weeks, then you'll be okay." She was right. I really hated having my chickens out of the nest and quickly learned how to e-mail -- which was much cheaper than long-distance calling. But, about the time I started enjoying going to the grocery store and buying what Steve and I liked rather than what the children or their boyfriends/girlfriends preferred, they came home for a weekend or for the holidays or for the summer.
From the Fall of '92 when the oldest headed to college until December of '99 when the last one got married had to be the most EXPENSIVE season of our lives. But, again, in retrospect, we wouldn't have had it any other way. And, after all, what is money for anyway?
Now, we've been Empty-Nesters for 10 1/2 years and grandparents for almost that long. This season suits us, too. There is so much to enjoy about watching our children be such thriving, successful adults and about playing with and delighting in our grandchildren. Once again, I almost wish I could stop the hands of the clock and just stay at this stage for a very long time to come.
But, I know that other seasons are ahead. Ones that may be the most challenging of all. I haven't been through these stages yet, but I've had a chance to watch my Dad and Steve's mom bravely face them. Losing a spouse, aging, failing health. Those don't sound like a lot of fun. I have to just trust God to give me the grace I will need when these times come.
As a compliment to my mother-in-law, just recently she has had to move into an assisted living facility because of health issues. How hard that must be to go from a comfortable 3-bedroom house, to a 2 bedroom apartment, and now to just one bedroom, a bathroom and a closet. This latest and probably greatest change has been met with determination, optimism and a very positive attitude. She is embracing life, meeting new friends and making herself look attractive and participate in new activities whether she wants to or not. We are very proud of her. I hope my children will be able to say the same of me one of these days. I pray that I won't go kicking and screaming into the times of transition that are inevitable between now and the end of my life.
In Ecclesiastes 3:2-8, there is a great list of occasions starting with the words, "a time to___." I want to be caught engaging in the best items on that list: planting, healing, building up, laughing, dancing, embracing, sewing, speaking, loving.
I trust in God who is Sovereign, who loves me, and who orders all the events in my life according to His purposes. Romans 8:28
Steve and I had a great trip to Auburn this past weekend, but we messed up one big time. That was in our restaurant choice for dinner on Friday night. We were trying to "be good" and stick to the low-carb diet we've been on, so when we saw a bright, shiny, new place with Diner in the title, we thought, "It's bound to have meat, vegetables and salad, so why not try it?" Big mistake. Huge. The service was lackluster, and the food tasted bad, really bad and was overpriced to boot. When we left, I sent a text message to the kids spelling out our tale of woe. Matt quickly responded with a text of his own: "Who goes to a diner in Auburn???" The clear implication was that he wouldn't be caught dead there. His choices -- and what should have been our choices -- would be Chuck's BarBQue, Guthrie's, Cheeburger/Cheeburger, or Niffer's. He wouldn't be looking for healthy, home-cooking. He'd be wanting to feel like a college student again. Laura's text said: "Why would you go anywhere besides Cheeburger or Guthrie's?" When I told her that we decided to be a little bit adventurous, her reply was classic -- "You don't go to Auburn for what's different. You go because of what is the SAME! War Eagle!"
I always enjoy walking past Langdon Hall, the site of my Senior Piano Recital given in December of 1971. I started my college journey at Samford, studying with my much-beloved teacher Dr. Betty Sue Shepherd. But, I gave that up to marry Steve and ended up here. I'd do it all over again, dear Steve.
This is Gargis Hall where many of my music classes were held. It was old then, so it's REALLY old now. :) Stately architecture, though, don't you think? And there's a glimpse of Samford Hall's iconic clock tower in the distance.
Here Steve and I are headed to the game, and you can see Jordan-Hare Stadium in the background and Haley Center. I hear that they're planning to tear down the Haley Center. I guess that piece of landscape will change soon -- hopefully for the better.
Here is Aubie -- award-winning mascot -- entering the stadium before game time. Right before kick-off, he came onto the field carrying the crystal football, symbol of Auburn's 2010 National Championship. Definitely a "goose-bump moment."
With 30 seconds left in the game, the score was 42-38 and thankfully, it stayed that way to the end. It was another day of chanting the cheers, singing the fight song, and pulling for the Tigers.
