MY MOM -- A Tribute to Her on the 25th Anniversary of Her Death

A mattress can't be both firm and soft, but my Mom could.
A steak can't be both tough and tender, but my Mom could.
"Prissy and smart" might say it a little better, but she was most certainly firm, tough, soft and tender all wrapped into one unique and special lady.
One morning in Ecuador a dear friend commented that she "wished she had grown up in the South." What prompted the remark appeared to be the printed napkins and roses I had on the table for our refreshments during a weekly Bible study. She said that I always "did things in a special way," and that she wished she'd been taught to do that. I felt highly complimented. Now I don't know whether growing up in Alabama had very much to do with it, but I'm SURE that being reared by Mildred Rose Collier was primarily responsible. She was feminine in every cell of her body and was always aware of the ambiance she was creating or in the places she visited. We never had to wonder whether she preferred the chain cafeterias or a sit-down restaurant with tablecloths, music and menus. She loved setting an attractive table and pleasing her guests. She had a beautiful smile and was loved by everyone. She even enjoyed going to the grocery store because she looked forward to visiting with some friends she might run into there. Her hair and nails were always done to perfection, and, even though she died suddenly at the very young age of 55, my youngest daughter who was 7 at the time remembers that "Grandmomma always smelled good."
I like to think that I am my mother's daughter, but I see her traits far clearer in my daughters and now in my five granddaughters, who enjoy pretty dresses, perfume, a touch of blush and sparkly nail polish! We all relish being "prissy" Southern Belles, and from our perspective, "prissy" is a word we like and understand.
My mother was also smart, shrewd, and direct -- a "tough cookie" in a very disarming way. She was competent in the jobs she undertook and was respected for her insight and the ideas she contributed. To my brother, sister, and me, she was our greatest cheerleader, but she also pulled no punches when it came to "speaking the truth in love." We could count on her for honesty and support, but she also fearlessly confronted us (and others) when she felt we weren't following the truths of the Bible. She was a perfect example of a submissive wife who was also a fully-functioning partner with my Dad.
Today is the 25th anniversary of her untimely and unexpected death, and I still miss her. I have wished for her so many times as my children have gotten married, and I would so love to have watched her with my own grandchildren. I'd like to think that by being my own version of "prissy and smart" I'm honoring who and what she was.
Some people probably thought I was too prissy to be on the mission field, but God knew before He called me exactly how He had wired me together, and He chose to use me "just as I am." I believe that it's okay to surround myself with pretty things and to create a lovely, welcoming environment whether I'm in the midst of a Third World country or living beside the Tennessee River. I believe that making myself look appealing and attractive is both a way of honoring my husband AND of being a positive witness for Christianity. I am convinced that God wants to draw from all the aspects of my personality to bring honor and glory to Him.
Queen Esther is a wonderful example of a person who had both outward beauty and inward strength and wisdom which God used to fulfill His purposes. The Bible described her as "lovely and beautiful" (Esther 2:7), but we also read that she was obedient and submissive to Mordecai, her cousin and guardian, and to Hegai, the custodian of the women brought into the king's palace. Subsequently, when the lives of her people the Jews were threatened, she displayed amazing courage and insight in approaching her husband the king and in orchestrating the confrontation with wicked Haman. Esther was a firm/soft, tough/tender woman who was used by God at a crucial point in the history of the News. My mother's similar qualities were used by God in my life, and I pray that her legacy will continue.
I love you, Mom.
I'll see you in Heaven.